You are taught with different textbooks

Liz and Mark went to Pre Cana in Ireland. Liz wasn’t a big fan but one thing really stuck with her. The priest said “As adults you have been taught what marriage is. But separately you have learned from different textbooks.”

I am stuck on this. I never thought how much our parents relationship guides our own. My parents were great until alcohol claimed my Dad. Joes parents worked well but when his Dad, Papa died, all help keeping Mom in-line was gone.

I am grateful Liz and Mark have a healthy relationship. Part of this I feel is because they both come from parents who are still married and regardless of challenges are together.

Kate and Adam don’t have that. Adam Jones about being a child from a broken home. For two years I rolled my eyes and said okay yup. After all he is a West Point grad. He is a 2nd Lieutenant in the Army. But now really paying attention to him, paying attention to how he fights, I realize he learned from his textbook. His textbook sucked.

I know from the bottom of my heart he loves my girl. I know he will do anything for her and protect her to the best of his ability. What I am also learning is he had such a bad textbook to learn from. How do you overcome that to be able to have a healthy marriage especially when the Army isn’t the easiest on relationships.