Tonight I lie here

Tonight I lie here next to him. I remember early in our marriage and learning the joy of sleeping late.

Soon this was a dream. We welcomed our babies and they kept us going every minute of every day. There was one morning I almost took him out. Throughout the night I visited every one of our children’s beds to keep them safe. Upon waking he said “Well that was a quiet night!”

Throughout all we were a team. We had a plan. It’s no where near our plan.

At times I think I know what I will do without him, or what life after will be.

He is asleep next to me. He is in desperate need of a haircut. He questions everything and he wants me to manage all of it.

Somedays. I am tired and simply hide from the world.