Once you ask

So my friends, I have told you recently how hard it is and has been for me to ask for help. I saw something today that said “There is strength in asking for help”. I have to say, I would not have paid attention except for what has happened this past week.

As a brief recap, I sent a stupid ass request to a cousin asking for help when the request did not read as I wanted it to. I wrote it in emotion and never re-read it. Later I kicked myself six ways to Tuesday and called myself every name there is for being so dumb. My cousin reached out to my mom and then to me.

He called me. I stumbled all over myself and in staying true to myself was a blithering idiot. I was able to then tell him exactly where I am and what help I was asking.

It was hard. So very incredibly hard to reach out. But I am so incredibly grateful that I did. He listened to me, joked with me and gave me the advice I so needed. Not only that he has set me up with a variety of his friends all with different expertise to help and advise us going forward.

My mom has spoken to one of his friends and I to two others. I cannot tell you the weight this has lifted from me. I cannot explain how hard it was to start the conversation but how freeing once it was started.

Damn, I am 50 years old and still living under my Dad and what he told me. I work for the Church and I hear and I preach that Jesus never judges us. Yet, I had this unbelievable struggle with asking for help. I can only thank God that he pushed me forward. The original message was a mess, but the request was received without judgement and just love. #help,#earlyonsetalz #alz #caregivers #faith #catholic