I found the when

For a few weeks now I have felt the burning need for a good cry.  You know, it happens.   Life takes hold and you need a release.   But I struggled.   If Joe hears me cry, he is right there and wants to fix it.   If I look upset, he wants to know why.   

A friend once told me of a spot in a back
parking lot she would go and have a good cry then go home.   But I am a messy crier.   My eyes are bloodshot and puffy and it’s just not pretty.    I don’t know if Joe would catch on but there is the potential Eric would.  

Last night I figured it out.    Joe went to bed early and Eric was plugged into the computer.   I was able to go into the dark living room and just let it all out.  I was able to have my good cry.   

The problem was it took my most of today to shake it off and feel better.   But for me it is huge that I know how to have that cry.