How will this work?

Eric my youngest has put his life on hold for a year to stay home with his dad and be primary caregiver. Its taking a toll and he needs to get out, move on and start his life. He is 19. He needs more. On the other hand I have been able to go to work six days a week, stay late for classes and meetings and know that Joe was okay. I knew he was safe and was fed. The day he broke a glass in the sink and thought he could grind the broken pieces in the garbage disposal it was Eric who was able to stop him and make sure he was safe.

So that comfort level is changing. Joe is at Adult Day three days a week. I am told he is great and helpful and having a good time when he is there. But he hates to wake up and get ready to go. Do I increase him to five days and know he is taken care of in that time? Do I attempt to leave him home for two days? When he does get home from Adult Day should I have a caregiver come on my long days? How do I let him feel like an adult but also make sure he is safe and cared for and not worry about him or the life of my appliances (one has died and one needed to be repaired)?

These questions run through my head so much. I wake up at night trying to figure out the best plan. I have been advised to put a camera in the rooms he occupies the most so I can watch him on my phone to check in one him. I did do this and have a great camera that shows the entire living room. I can "pop in" and have a quick check and most often find him in "his" spot on the couch watching TV. I have also been advised to find out what circuit the stove and garbage disposal are on and turn them off when I leave for work. I have not done that yet but will figure that out before Eric goes off to school.

I have a care meeting for Joe next week and hope to learn more about the possibilities. I have been told I will know when the time comes for different levels of care. I just am afraid of what might happen to make me aware of the next step. Till then I will wake up at night to ponder some more.