My Mug
Tell everyone to bring their favorite cup or mug with them on retreat! This was the text I received from Sue Landry the director of our Staff Retreat. Favorite cup or mug?
Our retreat theme was the Cup of my Life. Our first task was to talk about why we chose the mug we did, what did it mean to us. This was the easy part. Some mugs were special because they were a gift from a friend, some represented quiet time or time at home, or special moments. Then came the deep part. If this cup represented our life what fills it? What does it say about my life right now? Is our cup overflowing or not quite full? Is our cup full of clutter or things that are stale that we need to let go of? Our charge was to go off by ourselves and talk about our cup of life with God.
The grounds of the McMahon Retreat House at Mount Saint Mary Abbey are so beautiful and peace filled. Now add to that a simply beautiful day. I found a stone bench in the shade of trees overlooking a meadow and started my contemplation. It isn't easy to step back and take a long look at life. It isn't easy to find the "clutter" jamming my cup and knowing with this in my cup I am not allowing God fully in. I had a hard time that day really examining my clutter and trying to figure out if I was able to let it go.
At the end of day one after another long look at my clutter, while lying under a maple tree I realized I could not just let go of the clutter. However, while lying under that big, majestic maple, I looked at the grooves and marks in the bark. I saw the branches that were long and strong and covered with leaves blowing in the breeze. I also saw branches of various sizes that were withering, shrinking and dying. I was not able to simply let go of my clutter. My goal though after that day was to do my best to cut off the feeding source (my negative emotions) and let those things wither, shrink and die.
Day two again delved into the cluttered cup. After another time of reflection we had a symbolic burning ceremony where we all wrote down our clutter and offered it up to God in the smoke and incense of the fire. After spending day one pondering it was helpful to write these things down and offer them to God. Now came the time to reflect on what we want to fill our cup with. Another great reflection spot was a wooden swing, under anther tree, looking out at the same meadow. Now that I had spent so much time "uncluttering" my cup, filling it was so much easier. While there I watched the change of the sky. In the hour I sat on the swing the sky went from totally blue with white puffy clouds, to an area of blue with white puffy clouds, a huge black ominous cloud with peaks of blue on the far horizon. To me I realized life is like this. We go through those amazing perfect moments then the rough roads push in. But even in those rough times the joys and peace of love, friendship and hope buoy is to get us through. It is the clutter that squeezes out the blue. The clutter overshadows the joy. It keeps us from finding joy even in the struggle.
Retreat ended with Mass in the living room with six of us gathered together. Father Tomasz reminded us we need the mountain top moments to keep us strong in the valley. I didn't spend time with fellow staff these two days. I spent retreat and reflection with great friends. I admit, I didn't want to come down the mountain. I wanted to remain just a little bit longer. Until the next mountain top moment, I have enough to feed me in the valley.
